Whew, January is over! Why is this always the month that feels like it lasts an entire year? Let’s be real, January can be a tough month. We’re trying to get into a new routine, make some changes, and “start fresh”. Maybe you got to the end of the month and felt really discouraged that you didn’t stick with your goals like you wanted to. Maybe you feel like the weight of the world is heavier than it’s ever been. Maybe you can’t see the big picture. Maybe you feel lost, like you could desperately use someone to tell you what’s next. Maybe you’re wondering when you’re gonna catch a break, when things are going to work in your favor. Hear me, I feel you. A few months ago, I almost gave up on a dream of mine. For a long time, I had a dream of writing a blog that helped others, that let them know that they weren’t alone. I finally created a space to do that, then I almost gave it up before it ever really began. I remember the first time someone made a not-so-uplifting comment towards my dream. I brushed it off, but the next few times it happened I let it get to me. I started thinking to myself, “Who do I think I am? I have nothing figured out and I’m trying to help other people figure their mess out.” I stopped posting, I stopped talking about it around certain people. I was ashamed of something that I had worked hard for. Why? Because rejection will paralyze you and cause you to lose sight of what truly matters. Thinking that you have to be a certain way is the fastest way to lose who you are. A few days ago, I posted something pretty vulnerable on my Instagram story, writing just like I would on my blog. I was having a rough day, and found myself feeling unworthy. The responses I got were shocking. I had so many people message me thanking me for being transparent, and several people told me it helped them because they thought they were the only ones feeling that way. I am so thankful for that still-small-voice reminding me that there is purpose behind every single thing that I go through. I remember how badly I was struggling that day. When I wrote about it, I don’t even know that I was expecting anyone to respond, but more so I was writing because it helps me process what’s happening around me. I then realized there are people who also struggle, just like I do. Here’s the thing – I felt discouraged months ago because of what someone said to me. It then caused me to feel inadequate. This tells me two things:
- I must try every single day to be more aware of what I say and how I say things to those around me. What I project on to someone when I’m having a bad day could shape them in a way I never intended to.
- It is never anyone else’s job to label me as “worthy” or “unworthy”. It is, however, my job to ensure that I don’t let the words from other people give me identity. God has placed dreams and visions on the inside of me that I will always say yes to. I will always strive to remind myself that no one chooses what I’m worth or capable of doing. God chose me, and that is and always will be enough.
Now, I will never be able to tell you what to wear, how to be more stylish, what mascara is the best, or what products will give you mermaid hair. I do, however, love and support so many friends of mine who are excellent at that, like Double Shot of Sass, Jess Crum, etc. (love you both you’re incredibly fabulous).
But, that was never my dream. My dream was to create a place where I could write and express myself in a way that encourages others, gives them a place to land when life gets hard, and reminds them that they’re not alone and that they CAN do that thing that they’ve always dreamt of doing.
So, I promise to never give up. And if you’re reading this and January was really hard for you, I want to encourage you not to give up either. You missed your goals this month, and that’s okay. Don’t punish yourself for the next 11 months because you didn’t get it right this time. Start again. Start right now. Don’t wait on the next Monday, the next “slow season”, or when all of the conditions feel perfect, because they never will. Start today. Put things into motion, take small steps, and keep going.
You CAN do this, and whoever told you you can’t doesn’t get to decide for you. Pick your head up, and start again.
“I am sure of this, God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finished.” -Philippians 1:6
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